Our thoughts so often conspire to defeat us, even before we’ve given it a go. Over the last few months I’ve been speaking with many people who have doubts about their performance — particularly when new to their role. The confidence which characterised their old job seems to have been left behind when they moved to the new desk. Sound familiar?
When we dig a little deeper, it usually emerges that they based their confidence heavily on their technical capability in the old job and with relationships which had grown over a number of years. Nothing wrong with that, except for the fact that at some point change is going to occur.
When you have confidence it usually means that you are comfortable that you will be able to handle whatever comes up. This is the ‘so what’ end of the continuum. By that I mean that you feel assured that, no matter what occurs, you have the knowledge and experience to deal effectively with the situation. Of course, this needs to be tempered to avoid arrogance and complacency. Contrasting that, lack of confidence comprises thoughts of ‘what if’ as you look around corners; consider potential reaction — fear of the unknown.
One really great way to start moving more quickly to the ‘so what’ end of this continuum is to re-evaluate the basis of your confidence. For instance, instead of thinking of your absence of technical knowledge, you can start to realise that you have an effective learning process and are good at challenging the status quo. Focusing your confidence on your process of enquiry and ability to get to the right answers with an objective attitude is likely to be within easy reach — so start to relax and use these skills. Besides, another point worth remembering is that most people are quite prepared to allow you a little honeymoon, so make the most of it!
Colin Gautrey is becoming the most sought-after expert in power and influence by ambitious and talented professionals who are serious about accelerating their careers and their results. But, Colin is certainly not for the faint-hearted.
To get a feel for his practical approach, take a look at his 23 Actions That Will Increase Your Influence.
Other articles by Colin:
Building Trust Beyond the Obvious
Over recent months we have been engaged in debates about trust on many platforms. This has convinced me even more of the benefits of focusing on building trust in relationships.
On workshops, I often ask the question, “How can you build greater trust in your relationships?” The response is usually fairly predictable and comes down to doing what you say you’re going to do, telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth — and several similar ideas. Yet, I think we can go beyond this. Here are a few ideas…
This goes beyond building trust into the realm of intimate, mutually beneficial working relationships. Connecting deeply with people and finding the space and confidence to share openly. With this level of quality in your relationships, with the right people, you will create a solid foundation for your influence and your results.
Are You an Ethical Influencer? 21 Questions
It is very rare that I meet an unethical influencer ― thankfully! However, there are many I meet whom I wonder about. They operate on the fringes of integrity, in my view. Trouble is, as I have explained elsewhere, integrity means different things to different people. Right and wrong quickly descend into “it depends”. And this is a growing dilemma given the global diversity so many of us now live with.
When I am training people about influence, perhaps conveniently, I often…