Trust is a troublesome five letter word pointing to a tricky concept.

Once mastered, it transforms relationships and results while creating friends for life.

Let’s simplify to get you tightly focused on your action.

Trust is the expectation of performance, be that keeping secrets, delivering on time, or any other performance you could be affected by.

You may want a supplier to tell you the truth, but you may expect them to lie. If you know what performance to expect, you can act accordingly, either relying on what they’ve said, or verifying with another source before you buy.

The real problem with lack of trust is the unpredictability, so you don’t know how best to act.

Think of a situation with a stakeholder. What do you expect them to do or say? If you don’t know, how can you find out? If you do know what to expect, will that be good or bad for you? What action needs to be taken?

The uncertainty is the killer when trust is not present or is patchy, making you inefficient in your own action.

Thus, the imperative in important relationships is to get to know them so well that you can predict even their feelings in different situations.

A great way of accelerating this is beginning by helping them get to know how predictably/reliable you are - in positive ways of course!

You are predictable in appropriate ways aren’t you?

  Read More

The way you award respect to others will have a material impact on your relationships. I would also argue, it also says a great deal about your level of maturity.

There are many ways to respect others, so let’s play a little game. 

Are you awarding respect in a healthy, or an unhealthy way?

Think of 3 or 4 people you respect.

For each, note down what why they have your respect.

Take your time, this is really important. If you can get this right, your relationships, and the benefits that flow (each way) are going to skyrocket.

Don’t miss this opportunity. Write them down, at least 3 reasons for each person you are thinking of.

Do you notice any themes in the way you award respect?

Much as I’d love to reveal what’s in my mind right now, I’m going to leave it for a few days to let you reflect. This will help you to embrace this idea.

Check back here end of the week and you'll find the continuation, Healthy Respect.

  Read More

Unless you are able to clearly state your vision or goal in a sentence or two, you’re missing opportunities to realise it.

If you can’t be clear, you will lose efficiency of your own thoughts and action. Wandering around looking lost.

If you cannot explain it quickly to others, they’ll get confused, waste their own thought and action, or just ignore you and get on with other things.

When you look and sound lost, why would anyone else jump aboard your vision and purpose?

Clarity also makes it easy to oppose and argue. Yet without this (creative) tension and challenge, your vision will probably flounder anyway.

Is that why you don’t invest in greater clarity, because you are scared of the challenge?

If so, I’ve some news for you. It’s heading in your direction anyway.

 

Time to get proactive, ahead of the challenge, and get crystal clear on what you are shooting for?

  Read More

…regardless of circumstance.

When you have developed to the stage where this is true, you’ve cracked this game of life.

You cannot control others to make you happy, nor can you control world events and government policy to make you happy.

Happiness comes from within, not without. And you can (in time) learn to control what’s going on inside. You can learn to choose how you relate to the world, and those around you. 

No, I don’t mean withdraw from the world, nor from the action around you. You can still work to shape events and circumstance. Just detach those outcomes from your feelings of happiness.

It takes time, discipline, and humility to cultivate this in your life, but every day you can step a little closer, by choosing to be happy, regardless. 

So, if you’d like a tip from me, set this as your goal, to be busy with life and happy whatever the outcome.

Go on, start today - make today a happy day!

    Read More

There are three main problems with lack of confidence.

1. Paralysis. Dazzled by the headlights, unable to act.
2. Under-Performance: Doing things far below the actual level of competence.
3. Delay: While the individual figures out what to do for the best.

To increase your self-confidence, recognise three things:

1. Confidence is a state of mind. As such is potentially within your control.
2. Feeling lack of confidence is a positive indicator that you sit on the edge of an exciting new opportunity to learn.
3. Confidence in one area can be leveraged onto other areas or tasks.

Boosting self-confidence is all about altering your thoughts, which affect your feelings and in turn, adapt your performance to meet the challenge.

Arguably, confidence is simply the journey we are all on in life. A natural progression  of ups and downs. The rollercoaster we can life.

Assuming you want to live, you have to learn to ride this well, and enjoy the bumps along the way.

Have fun!

  Read More