In our journey exploring influence, a recurring motif has been the importance of understanding oneself and the people around us. Yet, the essence of influence lies even deeper than this. It beckons us to master the art of genuine listening and to wholly step into another person's world.

Listening is more than just an auditory process; it's a comprehensive act of engaging with someone else's narrative. To truly listen means to digest, reflect upon, and gain insight from the message being conveyed. To do this effectively, one must set aside any pre-existing judgements or biases. When we engage, especially with pivotal stakeholders, our focus should be on discerning their human experiences and emotions. Read More

Influence, an elusive trait for many, is profoundly intertwined with one's ability to radiate confidence. Throughout my journey, I've discovered that the true power to inspire and command respect hinges largely on one's assurance in their abilities, knowledge, and judgements. People naturally gravitate towards those who embody confidence. Thus, lesson #16 from my catalogue of insights on influence is unequivocal: Keep your confidence levels at maximum. Read More

Here’s an example of how provocation and challenge combined with a learning mindset can quickly transform events and outcomes.

Colin: "What would you like to work on today?"

Client: "Taking things personally. When I experience tough challenges I take things personally, I don’t know why, feels like I am failing and it is hard to take. I don’t show this, but it hits me on the inside. In a few days I’m up before an executive committee and I know I’m in for a tough time, they are going to hammer me because we have not met expectations, and I know it’s going to get ugly." Read More

No doubt about it, the most gratifying aspect of my private client coaching practice is observing the transformations people make. 

Noticing the way stress begins to evaporate, a sense of calm returns. Relaxed yet also alive and buzzing with excitement for a new chapter in their journey. Oh, and the smiles, and the laughs. These tell me that the change is taking root, new habits are forming, and their reality has shifted.

It can be a long journey, or a short simple one. All depends how ready you are, how motivated, and also how resilient you will be along the development path to withstand the provocative questions and challenge.

While there is no fixed reliable route map, several common stages need to be negotiated, in a more or less linear fashion: Read More

In the journey towards cultivating extraordinary influence, there's a crucial lesson to be learned: the power of emotional control. It's all too easy to fall into the trap of reacting emotionally to the actions of others, especially opponents or adversaries. Yet, counterintuitive as it may seem, this impulsive emotional reaction often plays right into their hands, giving them the upper hand in any situation. So, let's delve into why maintaining emotional equilibrium is key and how you can implement this lesson effectively.

Imagine a scenario where one of your opponents takes an action that you find infuriating. Your initial instinct might be to respond immediately, letting your emotions take the lead. However, this knee-jerk reaction is precisely what your opponent is hoping for. By luring you into an emotional response, they gain control over the situation, while you become the unwitting pawn in their game. Your emotions cloud your judgment, hindering your ability to think rationally and strategically. Read More